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Thursday 10 July 2014

25 Fun Little Things



Okay so I know this is a little different to what I usually post, but I realise I've never really done anything like this, and I thought what better time than the present to reveal some things about me and my life before the blog.

The thing is, a lot of people seem to think that I lie or make up the stories that feature on here as they seem understandably, completely absurd and I am a pretty theatrical person - but I can hand on heart say that I have never just made up or lied about anything on here, all these things have legit happened! Part of the reason I started blogging was because ridiculous things end up happening to me -  I just seem to live this Truman Show life, and however ridiculous it seems, I promise it is all true.

So I thought I'd write 25 truths, 25 facts/stories about me that you wouldn't have heard before, to give you a broader insight into my life and who I am.




25 Snippets Of Me


1) I am obsessed with writing lists - I literally make a list for everything. I even make lists of lists I have to make. It's almost become a compulsion, if I can't get to a pen and paper to write them down I just feel these words building up and jumbling all around inside of me and I get anxious and panicky that I'll forget stuff. Everyone at work always mocks me for having two hundred odd pieces of receipt paper on the go at once, bursting with random snippets and lists. Pretty sure they think I'm insane. Not sure they'd be wrong.


2) I have a perceptual condition known as synesthesia - a more or less unexplainable phenomenon which just makes me sound crazy or like I'm lying ha. You've probably heard something about it before, about people that can see sounds and hear colours etc. It basically means that all my senses have the ability to cross connect and partner up to create some pretty funny and odd sensations. I didn't know what it was called until recently, but I've attempted to explain it before on Scarphelia in posts like this here. If anyone would be interested in reading, I'd happily do a full blog post on my exact experiences with synesthesia! Let me know in the comments. 

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3) The best job I have ever had was when I was in High School, and I worked in a coffee shop inside a bookstore. The atmosphere was so perfect, the people were so interesting and we always ended up chatting to authors and writers at their in-store book signings. Also on every lunchbreak I'd take my little sandwhiches and sit on a bench outside the Art Gallery inside the shopping mall, and go have a little peruse inside before heading back to the shop. Absolutely loved it there. 

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4) In my early teens I was obsessed with World of Warcraft - Yep, I was one of those. Don't even regret it. Was totally wicked. I absolutely slayed the realms of Azeroth with my bitchin' blood elf mage called Dragonthorne, legend on the winds, terroiser of the Alliance. Still pretty sure her spirit lives on inside of me. *wipes away tear* R.I.P Dragonthorne, gone but never forgotten.

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5) I once dated a celebrity after asking them out over Twitter - I shall never reveal his true identity, but in a story of which you can read ALL about in this post here (part 1) and this post here (part 2), as a joke I once asked a celebrity out on a date via Twitter, and he actually accepted. My claim to fame can forever be I made out with someone who's verified on Twitter right?

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6) I got rejected from Harry Potter 4 - When I was 11 years-old, after a childhood so infatuated with the Harry Potter series, I desperately sent a letter to the Warner Brothers casting offices begging them to let me be an extra in one of the movies. I heard nothing back. Year after year I sent letter after letter, I remember even going through Harry Potter and The Goblet of Fire with a set of tiny post-it notes and marking every time there was a small speaking role or background character I could play. I wrote every single one of these down in a letter complete with the page number and line reference, and sent it in. That year was the only year I received a reply... It was still a no.


7) There's a long-running joke in my family that 'Katie kisses pizza' -Some things just stick with you for life right? Once when I was little and we had our extended family over, we were having pizza for dinner and it smelt so good that I tried to sniff it as close as I could and burnt my lip on the tray. I had a huge blister and after plenty of Savlon my whole family were falling about laughing. Dammit can't a girl express her ardent love for pizza without judgement these days?

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8) I once got so ill with the flu I passed out over a checkout girl in a supermarket - Keeping with the running theme of my life which is 'embarrassing moments around food', in my first week of Uni, I got Freshers Flu so bad that on a desperate trip for food and medicine at our local co-op, I suddenly went dizzy and passed out over the checkout, taking a whole crate of beer with me. I woke up later strapped in a wheelchair in an ambulance cause I'd been flailing so much when the medics had tried to pick me up. *sigh*

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9) I once lost my short-term memory after a ski accident -  In keeping with the second theme of 'stupid medical incidents', on a family ski trip when I was about 15/16, I slipped on some ice and hit the back of my head pretty hard. All I remember was pain. I blinked, and I was standing in the middle of a coffee shop with a hot chocolate in my hands. I then burst into tears 'cause I didn't know where I was or how I'd got there. I then have a very hazy memory of being in a hospital with my mum, then waking up the next day with a lump on my head. Honestly one of the most terrifying things to have ever happened to me. The creepiest thing was, I pretty much lost that entire day. I'd been reading a book and had to start again 'cause I didn't know who any of the characters were, and there were pictures on my camera of me that I had no recollection of being in. Seriously scary.


10) I used to be a Level 3 internationally-competing varsity cheerleader - on a lighter note, I spent 2 years as a back base at the Hertfordshire Sirens. I was even made senior captain at our 4th competition, and  got presented with a lilac, crystal encrusted spirit stick haaaa. If you've ever seen Bring It On, you'll know what I'm talking about. Bet you never would have guessed, huh?

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11) I wanted to be a spy SO BAD - When I was a kid I was absolutely obsessed with  watching Kim Possible and Totally Spies, and wanted nothing more in the world than to be a secret agent. I used to spend hours on our dial up internet connection googling jet packs, how to build your own hover board and where to buy gadgets. I'll always remember this one phone I wanted so so badly called an Xelirbi 6 or something, 'cause it looked exactly like the Totally Spies' compowders. Waiting on that call from Jerry at WHOOP since 2001.

Update: OMG I FOUND IT  *childhood memories flooding back*

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12) I must have seen Transformers over 50 times. It is literally the perfect movie and I won't have a bad word said against it. Nope. Shtum. Nuh-uh. It's just so good. I can probably directly quote a solid 75-78% of it. But don't even talk to me about those sequels.

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13) We went to Hawaii when I was 10 and I got shit hot at surfing - To celebrate my Dad's 50th, we all went on a ridiculous family trip to Hawaii. Hawaii 5-0 GEDDIT. I became completely enamoured with surfing whilst I was there and even got to watch a live surfing contest. A couple of months ago I found the T-shirt I'd bought at the contest which says 'Waikiki Surf School'. Ah man, think how totally rad I could have been now if I'd somehow kept it up.

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14) There have been two occasions in my life where I have been bitten by monkeys - And one time where I have been stung by a jellyfish. The first time I was bitten was in Gibraltar when I was about 9. I use the term 'monkey' lightly, this bitch was a motherfucking APE. I got a littleeeeee too close for a photo opportunity, and feeling threatened, this giant creature launched at me and went straight for the jugular. Spent the rest of the holiday looking like a little hussy with a lovebite from a monkey. The second time was in Brazil when I was 14, and to be fair I was trying to hand feed a wild spider monkey a banana. I couldn't even stay mad though 'cause it was hella cute. I also got stung by a jellyfish in Cuba and to this day have a little scar on the base of the index finger on my right hand.

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15) I've been to the Amazon rainforest - As aforementioned, when I was 14 we took the most ridiculous holiday to Brazil where we toured round Rio de Janeiro, Iguaccu, Argentina, Uruguay and Paraguay for the first week, before settling in Salvador for the second week. One of the coolest/freakiest moments was sitting in a canoe being paddled down the river and told strictly not to put our hands over the side of the boat because there were piranhas in the water. 

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Hold up, how am I only just noticing that my childhood was a little bit brilliant... It's almost a shame that I was so young I wasn't able to properly appreciate all the crazy places we were so lucky to be able to go to... Well hell, I guess I understand where my adventurous streak comes from.

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16) ...But yeah I've also stroked a lion and snuggled with a cheetah whilst on holiday in Mauritius. This was a fond memory of mine because despite being in captivity, these animals were as wild as they possibly could be. Their sanctuary spread for acres and acres, and there were no chains or restraints, these animals had simply been hand-raised from infancy after being orphaned in the wild and rescued. Such a beautiful memory. 



17) I have one tattoo and it's on the right side my back, just below my bra line. It's of six small birds in different flying positions. The very deep and troubled meaning behind this tattoo can be found in this post here. However, the particular tattoo artist I was assigned decided to go a little 'loose' with the design, and from a particular angle (as one person has pointed out and COUNTLESS others since) it almost looks like the letters 'F K E N Y A'. Prompting everyone to persistently ask me what I have against the country, and what it has ever done to me. *sigh*

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18) I can pretty much recite any song from The Simpsons off by heart - 'Seeeeee myyyyy vest, see my vest, made from real gorilla's chest, see this sweater, there's no better, than authentic Irish setter...' Man I love The Simpsons. Give me the opening bars of gems like 'Who Needs The Kwik-E-Mart?' or 'We Put The Spring in Springfield' and I'm yours forever.

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19) I have a Harry Potter-style scar on my forehead. You can just about see it by my hairline in the top picture. I got it when I was a wee little infant and wondered what it would be like to headbutt a plate glass door. The outcome, was unsurprising. What must've been surprising however, was running into the hallway to find your screaming infant baby covered in blood with a great shard of glass sticking out it's head. 

Ha... sorry mum, sorry dad.

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20) My greatest phobia in the world in being sick. The last time I was sick was February 18th 2008, around 6:42pm. How do I know this? Oh, only because it was perhaps the WORST DAY OF MY LIFE. I have panic attacks if I even begin to feel sick, it's awful. Second only to my phobia of dying suddenly without warning.

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21) My family come from New Zealand, and my Grandad dedicated his final earth-bound years to tracing back our family tree. Before he died, I promised to keep recording the Family Tree as it progresses, and all of his years of documents are now in my possession. I've looked through them many many times in fascination, and the only other Katie (Katherine) Oldham in our family was in the early 1800's, a woman who fled with her illicit lover on horseback and both drowned trying to cross a raging river.

Morbid, but I kinda love that.

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22) When I was 17 I secretly got through to the 3rd round of X Factor LOL I didn't tell a single soul and went up to London for the open audition. I ended up getting through to the third round and had to sign some pretty terrifying forms which basically mean until the day I die, Simon Cowell owns my soul. Scary right? Luckily I guess there's so many thousands of those forms they're essentially meaningless unless you go far in the show... I hope. It was actually the series which One Direction came out of. I thank my lucky stars I didn't get through because lord knows what state I'd be in now,  but I learnt SO much about the dark, dark side of the entertainment world.


23) I was only super rebellious once in my teens and had a house party whilst my parents were out of town. I was so scared of the house getting ruined that I took all the valuables down and hid them in the garage with a list of their exact locations, so I could replace them without raising suspicion after. I thought I'd  totally gotten away with it, til I came home from school to find my parents sat at the kitchen table, a piece of paper in their hands. Only I could get found out for having a house party because I bloody left out the prepared list of things I'd hidden for safekeeping.

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24) I really love the idea of strangers. One time last year, I was on the tube and got talking to this guy who was really interesting. On a massive rebellious whim, we decided to screw off the plans we'd previously had for that evening and went on a crazy adventure around London, finally ending with me getting in the first train home at 5:32am. He never even knew my name. I wrote about it in this post here if you fancy a gander.

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25) In High School, me and my best friend Harriet began to write this epic fantasy trilogy set in this tiny little village called Kilcreggan in Scotland. My stepdad, Scottish himself, was so awesome he arranged for us all to fly up there and visit this wee little place for Burns night. It was such an incredible experience to visit a place we'd spend so long almost believing was just fiction.

 I miss those characters. I think of them every now again, like they're stuck in limbo waiting to be bought forth into creation. I wonder if we'll ever complete it.  



Well, kudos if you made it to the end! I didn't really intend for it to get this long and rambly, but hey.

I hope you were at least somewhat entertained with my whimsical true life stories, this has actually been a bit of an eye-opener for me to write, especially in considerations of how far I travelled as a child. I think I'm going to make an effort to reminisce with my family when I see them next, dig out the old photo albums and such.

I only hope to go on to live more ridiculous adventures, and that you'll accompany on them all too.

Thanks for sticking about you wonderful folks, 

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